Chapter I
'The Cuban Revolution'
December 2021,
First up, Cuba I suppose I’ll start with the idea behind choosing the communist country of Cuba, I mean we’ve all seen fast and the furious, Dom Toretto speeding down the infamous coast line of Havana, any film in history of somebody smoking a ‘cuban cigar,’ James Bond pretending to watch birds as Halle Berry appears from the ocean. It just seems to be one of those destinations to tick off any list. Now from doing research, night after night looking for the best deal, looking for a flight and hotel package which didn’t require me too splash out 1 Million pound upfront, I came across ‘onthebeach.co.uk‘ it was a little bit different to navigate round, not quite as straight forward as say tui or Jet2 but what stood head and shoulders over the others was the price and ‘interest free monthly instalments.’ I paid £680 for around 10days this included flights and hotel. Getting back to work because of lockdown earning little to no money was difficult but this package was perfect. Now it didn’t include any transfers but also didn’t have any hidden costs like others. This was my first flight outside of Europe so It was a little over my head whilst planning, I may have missed the finer details, but nevertheless excited! Leaving early hours of the morning to drive 3 hours to Manchester airport, unlike the majority of airports I have flown from, I didn’t really think much difference in allowing for extra travel time, parking, traffic perhaps, ‘as I said this is all a learning curve’ my flight scheduled to depart around 9am seemed a simple and straight forward enough task, (was it fuck), firstly I have never driven to Manchester airport, its as if the signs don’t even know where to point, on top of this its pitch black, ice on the roads and all of a sudden I’m hours away from international takeoff and I’m doing rings around the car parks. Im usually a reasonably relaxed person if I know things are still within my control but on entering the departure front door its absolutely pandemonium, Manchester bloody airport staff have gone on a strike because of covid, I mean of all bloody days! I would also usually only take hand luggage, it just makes sense you want a towel buy one out there and leave it, you want some more t shirts ‘easy’ but it was included in the deal and thought why not, now although I didn’t take a big bag for carry on I still had to queue for the check in desk, this was of course the worst check in aisle in the airport, after some families and individuals started to push in, become restless, arguing with what little staff there was, it took me around an hour stood in a line listening to what was mostly angry scousers and mancs ‘great accents btw…’ Finally i’ve made it, yep good morning, sorry for the inconvenience , yep Im sure you are, passport please, here we are, tourist card…. excuse me…. so long story short you not only need an e visa but some sort of tourist card, luckily enough this can be obtained at any airport before you leave, but it will set you back around £35 and of course kicked out of a very long line to queue all over again. What a start to my first holiday in paradise ey, anywho that was that, it’s sorted they tell us this e visa can be obtained whilst on the plane with wifi or in the airport at an extra cost. Panic over and at least I can now start to look forward to the holiday. The airline itself was a tui aircraft, the flight was around 9 hours sounds a lot but in actual fact there was really nothing to it, economy seat so as long as you just don’t get unlucky with the passenger next to you it’s a breeze.
Before you know it, the aircraft is baking from the sunshine, the wheels are screeching as it touches down in Varadero, Cuba and as a cuban welcome theres fire engines lined up squirting their hoses in an almost door like fashion for the plane to pass through which was pretty cool, but now thinking back maybe we were just on fire…. Anyway Varadero is the package holiday destination, this is mostly because of it’s location, it’s a peninsula that stretches out into what would technically be the ‘Gulf of Mexico,’ it is protected and pretty much houses all hotels and beaches its purely for tourists where locals are not allowed in. I didn’t really think much about the transit from the airport to the hotel, ‘as mentioned several times before, lessons are being learnt,’ a tui representative called out for all tui passengers to board the bus, this obviously didnt include myself and what I will say airport taxi drivers can smell a foreigner, they wave at you and make room in their pockets for your money before you even step off the plane. Note: Thats not just Cuba thats EVERYWHERE! So Cuba ie Varadero isn’t the richest and most accessible airport ever, so when I say use and set up an e-sim before you go ‘DO IT,’ theres nothing worse in this new day and age not being able to use your mobile, for transport, for contact and what I usually do for bargaining, how are you to know what 1000 cuban peso is in GBP. It takes around 20-30mins from the airport so look to pay around 400 to 500 peso, or they ‘LOVE’ a foreign note, another tip for Cuba nearly everything the people buy is on the black market, its from ships that come and go, so their local currency is actually one of the weakest to bargain with and pretty bloody useless, but a euro, a dollar even sterling they love it. I must admit one of my favourite parts of any holiday is the one from the airport, the journey through incredible landscapes, the hustle and sometimes complete emptiness of the roads, the dirt tracks, the self made modes of transport surrounding you, its the first hit of realisation to remind you you’re a long way from home’ and I love it!
Like most holiday hotels they’re all very impressive very grand, huge accesses, gated communities and guarded. You feel safe of course but you also feel the rush of excitement, excitement of the unknown in front of you. I stayed in the ‘Melia Peninsula Varadero‘ and it did not disappoint. A very welcoming greeting followed by an easy check in service and shortly greeted by somebody on a golf cart to take me to my room, not only do you get a feeling of the unknown but these hotel grounds are huge, the bloke is talking absolute waffle with the biggest smile on his face and all it does is make you want to smile back, 30degrees of heat what was there to complain about. Nothing.
Throughout the holiday I took full advantage of the all inclusive benefits, explored the resort for hours, walked out across onto the white sandy beaches, palm trees sprawled everywhere and being close to Christmas time the lobby was decorated from floor to ceiling, it was a peculiar but awesome feeling, a Christmas tree whilst I am melting away. What I did start to notice by day 2 / 3 there wasn’t many Americans or even British in our resort, which was weird but plenty of Russians and Canadians, now this may have to so with different packages have certain hotels etc, i.e tui (British tourists only go to a handful of resorts) and onthebeach, love holidays go elsewhere I do not know, but anyway it was actually a welcome change, I haven’t come half way across the world to be bothered by the people I left. Nevertheless it was fun, peaceful and exactly what I needed, a few massages, dips in the pool, i.e swim to the pool bar sit there and drink myself into an oblivion, float back and repeat this process for days. The beach was excellent and the sea was warm and had a turquoise tint to it, not that I am one of those people who fear the ocean but if it helps you can see all the way to the bottom. At the beach not that you should ever feel uncomfortable or ill-prepared but I purchased a handy little gizmo which I found you could burry in the sand or wrap around the chair leg or pillar, I think it was called a ‘travel vault‘ but I found it very helpful if you wanted to go for a walk or go into the sea and not constantly look over your shoulder wondering if Pablo has fucked off with your room key and money.
As for excursions there is plenty online and some I will heavily use and recommend further down the line but for now, I stuck with the trusty saleswoman within the hotel itself, I mean you simply cannot come all the way to Cuba and not go to Havana! And what I will say is a private guide or group its one hell of an experience! 6am pickup from the hotel lobby and they pick you up in style! Think of a cuban car from anything you’ve heard of or seen in films and thats exactly what it is! I think it was around £80 pound each which for the experience, is well worth the money, I know it was a Chevrolet and from the 50’s but thats as far as my knowledge will take you, I did find out that Cuba is run by a pretty strict and also slightly ridiculous government ‘a lot in common’ these cars in the 50s were driven by high politicians, drug lords and the wealthy, once imports started arriving in the country from Russia and China newer cars were introduced and of course, the wealthy, the politicians and the drug lords were handed these cars, the old school Chevrolets were then sold at lower prices to the working class, these included mostly, yep taxi drivers. They made a living driving the nostalgic 50s style cars brightly painted to keep the tourism flowing and my god it works! It was interesting to find out, the classic American car as we all know are about as reliable as tits on a nun, so the classic American cars are all Japanese powered, yep nearly every single car that looks incredible actually has a Honda engine not that I blame them for this. Anyway back to the trip to Havana, its around 2hours drive and theres some to see en route not a tremendous amount if I am honest, as you enter Havana the buildings are a little run down painted all sorts of colours but still worn, apart from one, of course the US Embassy, it towers above most and has the classic all black SUV’s plastered around it. You see some other embassies, one I found very interesting our very own shares a garden with North Korea, thats right the one and only Kim Jong. The first stop is an important one in cuban history, the ‘Plaza de la Revolucion’ it’s where Fidel Castro himself gave numerous speeches to the cubans in-front of the Jose Marti Tower, something like that anyway.
We walked around the old town which is or was secured by huge castle walls, it was impressive how thick these walls were built metres deep, large cannons over 50 I think plastered across facing the sea, to keep out pirates I was told. We dived into some of the oldest buildings in the city, and was interesting to see how they are built and why, the more floors the more wealth. The bars are quirky and old with plenty of items dating back 100s of years hanging from the walls and ceilings, but of course if you come to Havana ‘Bar Floridita’ is the place to be, live music all day and night and was where Ernest Hemingway would write a lot of his novels, (not a clue myself) I found it pretty weird to have a gold statue of a man on a stool take up a large area of the bar but there we are, also the bar is world renown because of its claim to be the first place to make the frozen Daiquiri. But to be honest its just a very cool bar and somewhere to say you’ve been. Im pretty sure there was more on the agenda but I was pretty hungry and thirsty so was happy to move on to lunch. We were taken to a hidden away restaurant and the food was good they loveeeee the chicken out there, but nothing to scream or shout about apart from when it came to the bill, now small disclosure always carry cash on you in Cuba, this place is still pretty behind with the times so atm’s are lucky to be in credit, a lot of places don’t/wont accept their own currency so always handy to keep some dollars in the pocket. As I said everything they buy is through the black market, so foreign cash is king!
Heading back later that day to Varadero turned in to a slightly longer drive with a few more stops on the way back, but every bar on the roadsides is amazing locals selling homemade Pina coladas of course, in huge coconuts. It’s a must for anybody, arrived back at the hotel around 9pm just in time for the hotel entertainment which are always amusing. Waking up the following day was just another day in paradise, anything was possible and I felt like taking a walk to Varadero town, now from the hotel at the top of the peninsula its a good 40min walk but when you’re walking down the beach it makes it that much sweeter and easier to do. The locals were incredibly friendly, I am unsure if something was on or if its just like this all the time but music was blaring people were dancing in the streets and street vendors had beer towers and coladas just flying around, you could walk down a number of streets where locals would just open their gardens as kiosks to sell anything they had or could make. Further down the street there was a surprising bar, a Beatles bar I cant even tell you why it made no sense at all but it was cool nonetheless, there were a handful of bars that you could walk into on the main strip all very quiet though, it seemed not many tourists would venture into Varadero, which I preferred. Speaking to one of the barman at the Beatles bar he told us to go to another bar about a 10/15min walk and ask for ‘Machete’ yep thats right Machete, walking through back alleys, stray dogs and glass bottles wasn’t filling me with much confidence to say the least, but arrived at a very sophisticated bar, with a live piano player and happy hour on all shots. Its safe to say I did not walk back to the hotel, be lucky to make it by nightfall, but taxi drivers are of abundance and they are very helpful, once you’ve been there long enough you know what and when you’re getting ripped off and it was pleasant to know some people don’t try it. Remember it’s not always the lowest price you’re looking for its just what you would be happy to pay.
The next day brought sunshine as per and clear blue waters, it called for more drinks on the beach and weirdly camels, wasn’t the first place I would have thought to entertain people with a camel but seemed to do the trick. ‘In Cuba not the beach in general smart arses.’ Pina Coladas were my choice of poison, with a chaser of rum because ey why the hell not! It was a perfect way to just end the holiday, good food, friendly people and staff, Russians eating raw fish heads for breakfast with vodka, everything you could imagine what paradise is all about and now it was time for the journey home… or so I thought.
As it was still kind of covid era I was told we couldn’t leave the country unless I get a negative covid test result, now this country had supermarkets with empty aisles, paracetamol like gold dust and apparently nobody has toothpaste or toothbrushes, but we were expected to get a covid test within hours of leaving, the local hotel doctor would happily test you for cash, nothing else nothing less, seemed a very shifty money in pocket scheme but tbh when your mind is set for home and your packed the last thing you need is to quarantine miles from home and pay for extra travel arrangements, luckily enough hours before the flight I was given the all clear and could head to the airport. Arriving at the airport midday 28degrees in the sun was a challenge a bigger one apparently was the tui staff who were meant to have flown from Manchester to Varadero didn’t fancy making the trip…. waiting for the plane to arrive that never came. Being told the plane is an hour delayed then 2 then 3 then told it wont be today was a bit of a problem to say the least, as I said earlier no internet outside of the hotel and more of an issue was onthebeach don’t really have the same manpower as tui, the issue here now was tui package customers were offered a hotel not far for free to get their head down for the night and catch the next flight home, onthebeach not so much… theres no really representatives so although the price was much, much cheaper than the usual package websites it has its flaws too. People panicking, baking in the sun outside due to covid rules not allowing anyone in the airport unless your flight is within an hour was hard work! not too my surprise a random bloke from the airport comes out to say the flight has now left Manchester and should be a few hours out, I mean its as if nobody could find this fucking plane whilst it was in the air so they just told lies, but I couldn’t care any less I have a flight home and could put this shitty end to what was an amazing trip to the Caribbean behind me. The tui aircraft arrived there was no more issues and I finally got my head down on a plane with all 9 seats in my aisle spare, which pleased me very much! What a trip it was, my first out of the usual and it was certainly that. The bug has started it lives rent free in my head now and so it begins.
